Confession Of A Hopper

Such a funny thing that my dad asking me with an unbelievable tone since i am still attached to the same company and job for more than a year. Yes, i was a jobhopper.


Rotten Tomato

Negative environment fostered in your family will always be detrimental to your well being, in particular behaviors. How do we put a life to sleep without making it apparent? If that’s what it cost to be happy. Need to do some reading on food additives.

Mom’s second marriage would be the biggest mistak3 she ever made in her life. Its like living with a parasite, that from th3 beginning has been sucking the blood out of her. I can not understand relationship. Why women go something they claimed bad to worst. Everyday i am watching rotten tomato deteriorating. Is it desperation? Or loneliness?

In the last 3 consecutive nights they have been quarelling as if it’s normal to go through daily life in such a vibe. Being grateful that it’s weekend.

Why hasn’t god do something?

Destructive Comparison

I was reflecting and comparing.
Comparison can be destructive to ones happiness.
Everyone has their own path. We cant walk on their path and neither can they do similar to ours.
Thinking of it. I am empty. Nothing and zero.
My career just began to flourish. Alhamdulillah and i am indeed very grateful to god. Better to start somewhere and have something than nothing. But my peers are far ahead. I may not be able to catch up with them but all i could be is a better person than yesterday.
I have zero relationship. No companion and kids. Its an empty life. Again i questioned the purpose of life. Whay good does it serves us?

You And I (And Vitagen)

One night when he came back with dozens of my favorite drinks, vitagen. Purple and green. And I missed it.

Keep on going forward no matter how much we longed for the moment to repeat. What’s past shall remained in the past, where it belongs… as memories.

P/S: free my mind on this long break. (So-called long break).

The Forty Rules Of Love

I do not know when did I learn about Rumi. But it must have been by coincidence. And I fell in love.

Apparently my list of failed encounters to love has brought me to a deeper and intense journey of self-discovery. The true meaning of love and connection. Never in my life, have I thought that I would be giving so much attention on feeding my soul and straightening my path, as straight as a ruler perhaps.

I didn’t know where to start with Rumi, so I stumbled upon a novel written by a Turkish author, Elif Safak, called The Forty Rules Of Love. It’s addictive like cocaine. Couldn’t stop reading it. I couldn’t compare this with her international bestselling novel since I have not set my eye on that but for sure what I’m reading now is fireworks.

Or maybe I have a thing for novels that relates and blends history and the present. Traveling back to the past, learning about their faith/beliefs and culture, as such connecting them to our life. Just like my obsession with The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova and the jewish author, Mitch Albom. History/Culture and Religion/Spiritual/Faith.